Try Again

Hello World!

A lot has changed in such a short time. Where do I even begin? I have felt a million things to talk about. This is a update on how I’m doing.

So, let’s start with the location change.  I had to move back to Houston until school starts. I had two jobs in Austin, while I was taking a summer class. That sounds like a lot. It really wasn’t when both jobs only totaled to less than 20 hours a week, and the  class was only  hours a week One was a retail job at the University Co-op. The other was a custodial work at the university Catholic Center. I preferred the UCC job, because I had worked with trash before, and it was in a place that I called home. My co-op job was hard. I had to adapt to new situations quickly. I had to put an act in order to act in order to provide great service. It’s not like I don’t like being nice, but the ways in which I articulate and present myself don’t always come off as I plan to. The last thing is that I never got to work enough hours to prove myself. I can’t just blame the Co-op, I had a hard schedule. My therapy appointments always conflicted with my work, even when I tried to warn my manager about those conflicts, move around therapy appointments, etc. It was hard through I had so much free time outside of work. My summer class ended in mid-July and I went on vacation to Arkansas. I decided to come back to Austin to finish up the jobs for the rest of the summer. The thing was within a couple weeks, I had quit my Co-op job because they didn’t give me any hours for two weeks. I was told to quit because business is slow, and I wouldn’t get hours until August 18. I was planning on quitting on August 17, because after that I would be starting band, and it was going to busy. I quit my other job, too, because 10 hours a week wasn’t enough for me to remain mentally stable. I went home. 

I was invited to band week. I had originally submitted an audition before I left for Arkansas, July 9. That was originally included with the blog post. I failed that audition and I was not initially invited to band week.I was so determined to get in that I saw the opportunity to submit again before the deadline on July 28. I practiced twice as much in a week as I did in the months before. I worked hard and found my way to not only ensure I can play well, but that the audition proves my ability to play the best I can. I submitted my new audition video on July 27, before I left Austin, uncertain if it was enough. I got an email on July 31, saying that I passed my audition and got invited to Band Week. This isn’t the end of my journey, only a small stepping stone. The next few weeks are going to really hard, including Band Week itself, but I am hopeful that I can achieve anything I put my mind and heart into.

I know it has been a time of up and downs, but it is progressing slowly. I am including a playlist that helps me understand my emotions. I’ve been feeling rather down sometimes, based on the situations I have faced. I work hard and I’m always willing to try again.

https://open.spotify.com/embed/user/1279923019/playlist/5MLLSiMOS8w7GGI0x4oDQi

And this is all I have to give
Half a life and the will to live
And I don’t know what I have become
All I know is I’m coming home to you – Jason Wade

The Nerd of May

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